I believe because I have lived one…. Here is my story.
He was the first friend I made when we moved to our new home when I was 10. He would become so very dear to me. I thoroughly enjoyed spending Sunday evenings devising our own adventures. I can honestly say he was my first and honestly my only crush. I’m sure by this point you are rolling your eyes but it is true. I have never felt towards any man the way I have him. Yet it would become something I despised in myself…. You see when we got to about highschool age we fell apart. he quit coming to my house after church. In fact we quit talking very much all together, the strange part??? I honestly don’t know why. Occasionally we would talk when we ran into each other but only briefly. Every Sunday was torture for me however. I would see him and it was like rubbing salt in a wound. Eventually I would lose all hope of ever being with him.
I did try to move on yet subconsciously I always compared the guys I was seeing to him. I can clearly see that now in hindsight. Though I met some really great guys…..no one came close to him.
Years later he would contact me. Completely out of the blue. I am not typically one to react a lot at surprises, yet when I saw who it was I literally sat down. A rush of emotions would consume me. I spent most of the day at the barn attempting to get work done. There were many times his words literally took me to my knees with a rush of tears. Now I am not typically an emotional person. I grew up believing crying was a sign of weakness therefore there are very few people who have ever seen me cry. I tried my hardest not to get my hopes up that he would stick around. There would later come a day when I believed he was saying good bye…..forever. I have never been so depressed nor cried as much as I did that first day I believed I had lost him…
I decided I was going to forget him… I was going to be an independent woman who didn’t need a man. WHo could take care of herself and live an amazing life on her own. My girlfriends and I actually invented the K.I.S.S motto, Keep It Single Stupid.LOL
However, I believe the Lord had a surprise in store…..once again we would be reunited. I thought it would be so hard to be a friend to him because of all the pain he had unintentionally caused, yet strangely it wasn’t. We talked over ice cream and he asked me on an official date. I still had all intentions of being carefully guarded and not let myself be hurt again. My goal was to keep my distance in every sense of the word. That was all fine and dandy….until he asked me to dance to a slow dance he had chosen on the jute box…. That was the first time I had been close enough to touch him since we were children as I had tried to keep my distance. But from the moment he wrapped his arms around me the walls I had build which made me “cold-hearted” according to other guys melted. And then he kissed me……and all the hurt and pain was forgotten….it was a moment for me when it was as if time froze.
In my eyes the fact we are together is an absolute miracle. There are a lot of details I haven’t mentioned but basically there was no way on earth I ever believed we could or would be together. I am so glad we are though….He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. It really is a bit of a Cinderella story. He has helped to rescue me from my isolation. He has shown me there is life beyond working away my life on the ranch, where there were times during the summer when I didn’t have school when I wouldn’t leave the ranch for two weeks at a time and that was only to go to the grocery story for food. Most of all he has shown me love… I never knew love could be like this. To have someone show genuine concern and to take care of me, to shower me with affection and make me feel like the most blessed girl in the world. He has shown me what family is through being accepted into his. He has shown me what home is….and has tamed my gypsy heart. Home is where the heart is and it’s with him. For once instead of hurring to get back to my house and the isolation I had found security in, I hurry to get to him. I run to him when before I would never run to anyone. Perhaps one day I will be able to actually take the time to write our fairy tale to its full extent. I hope I can. For now I am enjoying the journey. There are still obstacles to overcome in this life but for once I don’t have to face them alone. I know that together we will get through whatever life throws our way. I am so blessed for my prince charming to have rescued my heart…. ❤